Gloucestershire - Chaos broke out today in Gloucestershire when the 2010 Cheese Rolling Contest got out of control. A crowd of 15.000 watched in horror as the cheeses began to mow down the competitors. The event had been originally cancelled...
Dutch, slightly righter than left politician, Geert Wilders, is on a holy mission. He wishes to prove not only to Holland, but also to the rest of the world that the Dutch are a nation of cheese eating, tulip growing, windmill worshipping weed smo...
Tensions between Washington and Tehran are set to increase today as the US has published a report by the CIA accusing Iran's Revolutionary Guards of dumping tons of cheese across the web. US Secretary of Almost-President, Hilary Clinton, stated at...
In the first of many cost saving measures, Cadbury has announced the replacement of all chocolate with Kraft's cheesy food product. The company claims that most consumers will not even notice the difference. Dairy Milk bars will be the first trea...
Don Fredo Fusilli, capo of the famous Fusilli Mozzarella and Meatball Corporation of Sicily flatly denied today that his organization had anything to do with quantities of cow's milk being found in products purporting to be 100% pure buffalo mozzarel...
Supermarkets have announced that they are to put security tags on cheese. The move follows a spate of cheese thefts from stores around the country. On Monday a large ball of Edam was rolled out of Tesco's in Croydon. Last Friday a cheddar truckle was...
The sale of cheese from Iraq, named 'Iraq Cheese' has risen 450% in the last 3 months. Many believe the reason for this is the consumer's curiosity of what Iraq's cheese tastes like. Also the price is amazingly good value for money, at just £1.06...
Spam, a strange mixture of pork and ham and chemicals, was today back on sale in Montgomery and Python's, London's famous parrot and cheese shop in Shaftesbury Avenue. 'This spam was thought to be deceased, to be pushing up daisies, and to be ex-s...
New York, NY -- Dittoheads the nation over are celebrating the new-found popularity of Limbaugh's Own, the brand name of Rush Limbaugh's very own blend of fromunda cheeses intended for mass consumption. "For years, I thought I was all alone," one...
A miracle in the small college town of Denton, Texas, where a local woman credits her half-eaten toasted cheese sandwich, purportedly showing the image of The Obama, with the unexpected refinancing of her mortgage, allowing her to keep her home of te...
Some put it down to Chalk having lost its dominance in education. Others say Cheese has mellowed over the years. Whatever the reason, it seems that Chalk and Cheese have become less diverse. The idea that there were insurmountable differences be...
The Dairy Council of America, an independent board of major dairy owners, approved the retail sales of cheese made from breast milk under the "cheese" and "dairy" names. The products are scheduled to begin hitting store shelves at the beginning of t...
After years of study, a highly-paid team of researchers has confirmed that the Moon is in fact made of cheese after all. After visiting the moon in 1969, the American space agency NASA declared that the Earth's only natural satellite was composed...
Almost half a century after his disappearance (following the cheese-gate scandal of 1958) celebrated cheese inventor, Sir Pettigrew Wynethrop, has been discovered chained to a sacrificial stone alter in the basement of his penthouse apartment in Chis...
Fine cheese cultivator, Redmond Leicester, is reportedly furious with his new nickname, 'Red Leicester'. The childish joke had arisen after an offensively situated hole in his trousers had caused embarrassment. Observing that his cheeks had redde...
The Church of England scientific home investigations team can reveal gays are made of cheese. S.H.I.T. Has spent over 300 years investigating homosexuality and invested over 600 sugar lumps of God's money to prove that homosexuals are made of ch...
Zurich, SWITZERLAND - Totally frustrated and pulling out hair by the roots, Swiss President Pascal Couchepin stated that he was sick and tired of new tariffs being added against his nation and that a Swiss cheese embargo is in effect come Monday morn...
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