The Department Of Employment today issued an advisory on its website advising clients and the general public that one way to avoid the most serious consequences of the current recession, is for people to embrace the concept of punctuality in all walk...
Many people have asked themselves where has the time gone, and wondered why there does not seem to be enough hours in the day. After a three year investigation by the temporal branch of Scotland Yard it looks like an answer to both questions has...
In the latest desperate attempt to pull the nation out of economic stagnation, Britain's Prime Minister David Cameron announced today that the clocks would go forward by 24 hours on Sunday. The Government dismissed the objections of sane people ag...
After failing to wake up on time for parliament due to a small bug in their iPhone alarm system that failed to account for British Summer Time ending and Greenwich Mean Time resuming, government ministers are planning on scrapping the changing of the...
After many days of deliberation, European Ministers have decided that the European clock will go digital on 1st January 2011. Mssr Boulesup, the minister responsible for time, said it will help citizens work out time much more easily. From next...
After three centuries in its current position next to the Royal Observatory in Greenwich Park the zero latitude line is to move 31 metres to the left. A European Community panel of two French Judges and one German Judge decided that the line paint...
We can exclusively reveal that Procrastination has sensationally been exposed as the thief of time and was today sentenced for 10 years. Speaking for Scotland Yard Officer James McSporran told us "Well, we've suspected this for quite some time but...
When Yorkshireman Bob Ecclesfield invented a time-machine, it must seemed that he was going to have a lot of grand days ahead of him. However, one particular time adventure turned out to be more interesting than he imagined. Bob, 43, wanted to know what a paradox felt like. He decided to go for the ol' chestnut of trying to kill his Grandfather in order to see whether he would end up being a co...
The world famous changing of the guard outside Buckingham Palace in London, England, was delayed on Sunday when the Royal House Cavalry forgot that British Summer Time was starting and had not reset their clocks. This event that takes place every...
Professor Hawkins has revealed that a time machine has been created by one of his Academic friends, but that it has very serious problems. He has also revealed that his friend has decided to use his time machine to go back in time to prevent the inv...
For many years a local attraction, The Oregon Vortex, has befuddled visitors with balls that roll uphill, children appear taller than their parents, plumb lines that hang sideways, buildings warped and twisted, concessions and curios costly, compasse...
In a radical change of priorities, spurred on by a fascination with vampires and all things dark, world citizens have called for moonlight savings time. According to pollsters, people are demanding that daylight savings time be rescinded and replace...
Santiago,Chile. In this South American country, the capitol moved 20 feet farther West. Buenos Aires also jumped just slightly Westward. But other issues connected with the shaking earth have appeared. Scientists have calculated that the planet's...
You thought you knew the correct time. Wrong. The Jet Propulsion Laboratory (JPL) seismic desk has calculated it is now 3 seconds earlier than it was before the 8.8 magnitude quake in Chili. There is a reason you were late for that meeting. Your...
People who have not enough time for Christmas shopping will be allowed to use a 30 hours day instead of the usual 24 hours day during the festive season. Greenwich Observatory Daylight Committee held meetings with the representatives of major superst...
The leader of the British Nasty Party, the Rev Dr Nick Nasty, said in an interview last night that his appearance on the BBC's Question Time programme was actually a complete mistake. What he had said earlier in the month had been taken totally ou...
Anthropologists have adjusted a new date for the end of the world to Jan 13, 2013, Barack Obama's last day in office. It is now believed by many scientists that the only way to continue the existence of the universe is to reelect Obama as President o...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
