Anthony McPartlin, & Declan Donnelly, otherwise known as Ant & Dec,the comedy duo from Newcastle wanted to join the Geordie Nationalist Party to get a fairer deal for Geordie's but they have been warned they could lose their lucrative TV deal...
The streets of Newcastle were tonight awash with celebrating Geordies as they saluted the Magpies return to the Premier League, the place where they belong apparently. Among the revellers were celebrity supporters including Ant and Dec, Sting, Jim...
After two years of investigation it has now been revealed that the top ITV act of Ant and Dec are gradually morphing into 70's and 80's comedians Morecambe and Wise. Scientists at the University College London have now finished their studies and have...
This year's 'I'm a Celebrity Get me Out of Here' is so crap that presenters Ant and Dec have taken drastic steps to try and boost their flagging ratings. For a starter, both presenters will present the show naked. Ant (the slightly taller, bla...
Former page three model, and subject of millions of male fantasies back in the 80's, Samantha Fox was tonight voted out of the jungle on ultra crap Z-list celeb reality show "I'm An Asshole! Get Me Out Of Here Now!" The vertically challenged star,...
A Brit reality TV show was today slated by critics as just a continual version of the same old crap, recycled over and over again. Katie Price, aka Jordan, glamour model and celebrity slapper has provided a smidgin of interest, but apart from her,...
TV duo Ant and Dec have been unmasked as two penis-sharing goblins. The funny little men who present all kinds of random shite on ITV, were caught out whilst filming a 'hilarious' sketch to be broadcast on one of their upcoming shitty telly shows.
In a sensational programme last night, presenters Ant and Dec were voted off Britain's got talent in favour of an incontinent granny and a group of dancers performing in gimp masks. The red hot favourites for the show only polled 10% of the vote,...
Former BBC presenter and total barmpot, David Icke, is back in the news and this time your guess is as good as mine. Icke, one half of the iconic "River Deep Mountain High", sixties singing sensations, Icon Teeny Toenail, told me: "There's an o...
Just days after announcing a shock move to Peterborough in the wake of the financial crisis that threatens to take them off the air for good, ITV have today revealed their startling new cost-cutting Autumn schedule. In a press conference at a Lit...
The worst weather to hit Australia since settlement by Europeans has affected the hit ITV reality show, I'm A Celebrity. "It's not stopped raining," said Ant. "It's like a monsoon," added Dec. One of the two original two camps had to be aba...
It was announced by Clarence House this week that as part of the 30th anniversary celebrations for The Prince's Trust, HRH Prince Charles, and sons Wills and Harry (aka the Ginger Minger), will demean their Royal dignity to a fresh low in being inter...
Ant and Dec are to sensationally quit their famous 'double act' after they became increasingly frustrated that in a recent poll, 88% of the general public still did not know who was Ant and who was Dec.
Previously believed to be popular entertainers Ant and Dec were today horrified to learn that not only are they actually unpopular, but they are despised by the average TV viewer.
UK broadcaster ITV was today fined a record £5.6m by regulator OFCOM for the 'never ending stream of puerile drivel spewing from a mediocre network with no sense of quality control'. ITV is said to be conducting a phone-in poll of its board o...
The phone in scandals that have rocked the civilised world and caused the public stoning of a Blue Peter cat continue.
One of the Diminutive Short Arsed Chirpy Geordie's Ant or Dec is set to win I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here as they are the only Celeb's left deep in Australian Jungle after all the other Celeb's hot footed it to the nearest Pub.
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