Previously believed to be popular entertainers Ant and Dec were today horrified to learn that not only are they actually unpopular, but they are despised by the average TV viewer.
The duo, also known as Ant McDeclan and Dec McAntlin, were previously believed to dominate popular light entertainment However, it has emerged today that the sole reason Ant and Dec do so well on TV is because ITV rigged every award, every viewing figure and every accolade they ever received. ITV has admitted it even rigged other entertainers comments regarding the "despised duo."
Formerly popular millionaire karaoke star Robbie Williams, who presented the pair with the "peoples choice" award last year said today,"I f*ckin' hate them, I only did it for the 30 grand ITV paid me to turn up. After the cameras stopped rolling I whacked one of them with the award and cut his head. The irony is they really thought they were popular."
Ant and Dec's agent released a statement today saying,"Please leave Ant and Dec to grieve privately for their careers today, it has come as a great shock to them that they are actually disliked intensely by the public. The are starting to make sense of the way people react to them now."
When asked which one had been struck a blow by Robbie Williams after last years awards ceremony their agent relied,"Dunno. I couldn't be bothered to find out which one's which either."