WASHINGTON, DC -- About a week after the nation let out a collective groan at the announcement that Ralph Nader was running for President of the United states yet again, very few people acted surprised when earlier today Nader declared that he had ch...
BOSTON, MA -- A former aide to Mitt Romney, the former Governor of Massachusetts who recently dropped out of the Presidential race because he claimed "he hated to lose," says that Romney dropped out of the race for an entirely different rea...
LITTLE ROCK, AR -- Last night, during a taping of Larry King Live, Baptist preacher and Republican Presidential candidate, Mike Huckabee, challenged Jewish civic leaders to a winner-take-all cage match to determine whose religion is "cooler.&quo...
BOSTON, MA -- The political world was stunned last weekend when news that Republican Presidential hopeful, Mitt Romney, was a polygamist was leaked to the media.
TEMPE, AZ -- Scientists and language professors at Arizona State University have joined forces to take the ambiguity out of the use of the word "fuck".
WASHINGTON, DC -- While addressing a meeting of the Office of Drug Control Policy (ODCP), health specialist Jacqui Chan warned of a potential epidemic of abusing what she called the next meth or crack cocaine, jenken.
SHELBY COUNTY, KY -- Residents of tiny Baghdad got a rude awakening at five thirty this morning when U.S. planes dive-bombed and completely destroyed the town.
PRINCETON, NJ -- A study conducted by the Sociology Department at Princeton University has determined that drinking light beer does not actually make you cool.
NAUGATUCK, CT -- After years of believing there was a government conspiracy to make him a scapegoat for terrorists activities all over the planet, Albert Kayda, 53, has surrendered himself to authorities.
PHILADELPHIA, PA--The airline carrier US Airways continues to plummet in customer satisfaction polls.
FORT WAYNE, IN -- Last night police found the half-eaten remains of Vic Reynolds in his second floor midtown apartment.
LOS ANGELES, CA -- Michael Bay, director of big budget action films like "Transformers: the Movie," "Bad Boys" and "Pearl Harbor" has tentatively signed on to direct his biggest film yet.
CONCORD, NH -- There are a growing number of scams run through spam e-mails and fake websites and countless numbers of people every year fall victim to Internet scams.
TAMPA, FL -- A college Freshman named Eddie Donaldson is on a quest that he says he will complete even if it kills him. Eddie, who has yet to declare a major at the University of South Florida, is thoroughly convinced that nacho cheese has to have s...
SCOTTSBLUFF, NE -- A group of dental tech students at Western Nebraska Community College have accidentally discovered that branded body sprays and body washes cause cancer in laboratory animals.
KINGMAN, AZ -- Darlene Quinn is a cashier at the Kingman, Arizona, Love's Truck Stop who is starting to think of herself of a merchant of death. She does, after all, sell beer, cigarettes and the "Hee Haw" DVDs that have caused no less...
SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- Poor Lars Ulrich. Absolutely no one is in the least bit interested in the Metallica drummer's first solo release, a collection of his favorite Danish Christmas carols, tentatively called "Jule," (pronounced You-La)...
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