Ralph Nader Chooses Joe Lieberman as Running-Mate

Funny story written by Zack Matheson

Wednesday, 27 February 2008

WASHINGTON, DC -- About a week after the nation let out a collective groan at the announcement that Ralph Nader was running for President of the United states yet again, very few people acted surprised when earlier today Nader declared that he had chosen Joe Lieberman, the "Independent Democratic" Senator from Connecticut, to be his Vice Presidential running-mate.

The Nader/Lieberman campaign, already dubbed the "Assholes For America" ticket, had many Democrats shaking their heads.

"Is there anything that (Joe) Lieberman won't stoop to doing?" asked one prominent Democratic Congressman, "First he's endorsing John McCain, a Republican, and then he decides to run against him. Is Joe Lieberman that much of a political whore?"

The Nader/Lieberman campaign has also announced that while some Presidential candidates are using classic rock songs for their theme music, Nader has chosen the 1989 Nine Inch Nails hit, "Head Like A Hole" for his theme song because it "[is] hip and is something the kids understand."

Some Nader supporters are very enthusiastic about Nader's bid for President and Nader's choice for running-mate.

"Ralph's a classy guy. I mean he still believes that there's no difference between George W. Bush and John Kerry," said Richard Faurot, an out of work factory worker from Akron who lost his house to foreclosure last December. "I like guys who don't flip-flop in their beliefs, just like Ralph Nader and Joe Lieberman."

As to whether or not the Nader/Lieberman ticket will have any real impact in the November elections, many Democrats are refusing to comment, though many are secretly hoping that Ralph Nader might explode like the old Ford Pintos he once warned consumers about.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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