Wayne Rooney - My Fake Diary

Friday, 30 March 2012

I've been busy on Twitter this week, hope everyone takes a look. It'll impress me sponsors no end if I get millions more followers!

Me two race horses Tomway un Switcherooney should be up and running soon, that'll please me Dad no end.

Haven't heard owt frum high class prossie Helen Wood for ages. But her tempting me to stray from fidelity failed to make Colleen leave me. Why should she leave £38m of talent anyway?