Tom Cruise - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 14 May 2013

Dear Diary - I miss Katie Holmes more than I ever imagined. I miss the way she looked at me with those puppy eyes and always asked me if she could get me a beer, or some Scotch, or a Hostess Twinkie.

I tell myself that I will be fine but I just can't get her succulent lips out of my mind. I guess I will just try and find a new girlfriend to replace her like Vice-President Joe Biden suggested I do when he and I had dinner at D.C.'s Burger Bandit.

I'll be fine. I'll be making another movie soon to take my mind off my sweet, lovable, adorable, erotic-as-the-dickens Katie.

Tom Cruise


Previous Dates Next Dates

« Full list of Spoof Celebrity Diaries

Send to a friend

Tell your friends about The Spoof!

Go to top
101 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more