Ray Mears - My Fake Diary

Saturday, 12 April 2008

I knocked on the door and who should answer?

No carina for sure. It was an Indian no less - resplendant in a turban and laden with gold chains.

"How may I be helping you please?"

"Oh I think I have the wrong house, I thought this was a call centre." I said.

"Yes it is my friend! We all work for BT and we fool people into thinking that we are in Mumbai when really this is downtown bradford in the frozen North"

"There's a website that does that sort of thing. I thinks it's called TheSpoof.com. Well who the hell are you?"

"I am Mohit, the pimp err...call centre manager."

"Could I speak to carina please?"

"Yes please hold the line....oh sorry, I'll go and get her."

He disappeared up the stairs.

My heart was going 20 to the dozen.

The chap returned and said apologetically; "I'm sorry, but carina is my chief call girl and she is engaged with a difficult customer at the moment. I have told her you want to see her".....


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