Paula Abdul - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 3 March 2011

Dear Diary,

Well I received my first unemployment check and food stamps today.

It sure feels kinda nice to get paid and not have to go to work - wow what a novel idea.

And the food stamps are real pretty. They have a picture of President Obama's two daughters Malia and Sasha sitting on a pony on the White House lawn.

I called up Simon (Cowell) yesterday and the dumb shithead has yet to return my call...wait till I see him in person. I will give him a swift kick in his English nads.

Paula