Napoleon - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 22 October 2014

NOVEMBRE 1 1804

Bonsoir

I have been sitting for my Battle Portrait at the brush of Jacques - Louis...this has entailed taking orders in a way which I am not used to, as the Greatest Military Commander of All Time...''Look up ..now to the side , Sire , try to keep still ...I cannot work like this....bring me a cup of alcohol-free wine..'

Well, I cannot begin to express my horror, as he showed me some of the preliminary sketches..in which I am portrayed with a BEARD.and MOUSTACHES..and not just a chic, trim , Spanish one....but a long, bushy , Biblical One....I said...''What is the meaning of this outrage , you upstart Lyonnais Peasant, you dare to portray me as a Portuguese Pirate or Anglais Rugby Prop??!!.....To which he shrugged his feeble shoulders
and said : Monsieur, it is Movember , Madame Josephine has insisted

I am speechless,
N