George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Monday, 16 June 2008

Met with that Mr Brown today,

Strange, he looks nothing like he did in Reservoir Dogs. I asked him how Paddington Bear was, but he told me that Mr Gruber was looking after him for 42 days. I did not want to press any further than I had done.

Mr Blair was nowhere around either, and nobody came into London to say hello to me. I thought it was most rude, not even Austen Powers was there, and he goes to the opening of envelopes these days.

I was told that later I would meet a load of old monkeys. I am looking forward to meeting Mickey Dolenz and Peter Tork, but I don't want to meet Mr Davey Jones. I don't like small people who talk in English.

Queenie gives me the Heebee jeebies. I asked Laura what that meant. She said that they sang songs, but I thought that was just a load of Jive talkin', telling me lies.

I always felt that it was me who told the lies, but maybe I was wrong there as well.


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