George Osborne - My Fake Diary
Sunday, 2 December 2012
I have to give a speech to the house tomorrow to tell all those nasty shouting people that I have failed to do anything apart from make poor people worse off. I have to say this in such a way that no one can tell that is really the plan. Dave has got his chum Mrs Brooks to help me write the speech. She is very nice and said I can go riding on one of her horses when I learn to count up to 20. My fag Vince is upset I did a whoopsie in one of the red boxes and he has to clean it out again.