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Jacko Seen Lurking Near Octuplets

Funny story: Jacko Seen Lurking Near Octuplets

Nowhere CA -- Former King of Pop, Micheal (Jacko) Jackson, has been seen hanging around the hospital floor where the famous octuplets were born last week. The bizarrely dressed Jacko "looked like something from Night of the Living Dead." according t...

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Dorothy Arrested For Oz Fires

Funny story: Dorothy Arrested For Oz Fires

Munchkin-land Oz -- Dorothy Gale is under arrest and facing multiple felonies that could send her to the electric chair. The creepy little brat stands accused of starting an inferno that scorched Oz and led to thousands of deaths. Her sleazy cohort...

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Mona Lisa Stops Smiling

Funny story: Mona Lisa Stops Smiling

Paris-- The famous grin is gone. The Mona Lisa finally stopped smiling after over 500 years. Art lovers left the Lube Museum in tears this morning after the discovery. The museum was briefly closed 'for security reasons' but opened later, minus th...

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Masturbation Linked To Global Warming

Funny story: Masturbation Linked To Global Warming

(New Yawk, NY)-- New scientific data indicates most global warming can be blamed on the common practice of masturbation. The disgusting habit is responsible for raising world-wide temperatures by at least 5 degrees. Only male masturbation was studi...

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Pitt And Jolie To Marry February 30th

Funny story: Pitt And Jolie To Marry February 30th

Hollywood CA -- The date's been set and the cake's been ordered! Angie Pitt and Brad Jolie plan to tie the knot on February 30th! Brad finally popped the question after Angie squirted out their latest whelp. Everyone in Hollywood will be there. P...

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Cat Eats Its Owner

Funny story: Cat Eats Its Owner

Philadelphia PA-- A domesticated house cat ate her owner for dinner sometime last week. 'Ginger' is a 11 year old feline that became bored with eating canned cat food, so she ate her owner instead. Skeletal remains of a Mr. Fish, 98, were found in...

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Last Baby-Boomer Drops Dead

Funny story: Last Baby-Boomer Drops Dead

Washington DC-- The Baby Boom Generation is dead. Wally Brady, 52, died last night from cirrhosis of the liver. He was the only remaining person born between the years 1945 and 1962. The generation known for its excesses paid the ultimate price.

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Pawns Strike For Equal Rights

Funny story: Pawns Strike For Equal Rights

Portmeirion Wales -- Pawns began a strike on millions of chessboards around the world today. The lowly pawns are tired of being used and abused and want some respect from chess players and they also demand equal rights. Pawns want the right to move...

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Queen Victoria To Be Resurrected

Funny story: Queen Victoria To Be Resurrected

Winchester-- The DNA of Queen Victoria is to be used to resurrect Her Highness for the 21st Century. The resurrection project is of the highest priority for Queen Elizabeth II. The current queen believes her son Charles and grandsons are not fit to...

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Mandatory Drug Testing Stuns Capitol Hill

Funny story: Mandatory Drug Testing Stuns Capitol Hill

Washington DC-- Senators and congressional leaders from both sides of the aisle were stunned by an executive order requiring mandatory drug testing. President Obama signed the order at midnight and by dawn an army of drug testers wearing yellow rain...

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Obama Builds Basketball Court In White House

Funny story: Obama Builds Basketball Court In White House

Washington DC-- President Obama had a basketball court built in the White House over the weekend. The court is NBA regulation size and was paid for with private donations. Mr. Obama plans to use the court 'everyday' to stay in shape and to help him...

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Pope Embraces Communism

Funny story: Pope Embraces Communism

(Vatican City) Pope Benedict XVI made a sharp turn to the Left and gave his blessing to Communism. The Pope said Capitalism was "evil from start to finish" and it was time to begin a New World Order. The Pope declared Jesus was the world's first C...

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Blonde Scientist Finds Human Babies Incredibly Dumb

Funny story: Blonde Scientist Finds Human Babies Incredibly Dumb

Philadelphia PA-- It turns out babies are incredibly stupid! That is the opinion of Dr. Barbi Doll of the University of Pencilvania. Dr. Doll just completed a 20-year study of babies from every income and ethnic group. She concluded human babies a...

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Dubai Builds Tower Of Babel

Funny story: Dubai Builds Tower Of Babel

Dubai, UAE -- An ancient legend is coming to life in this tiny emirate. The Tower Of Babel is under construction on the shores of the Persian Gulf. The Tower will be 5433 cubits and 2 palms high (about 1.5 miles) when completed. The Tower of Babe...

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Pencils Nearly Extinct

Funny story: Pencils Nearly Extinct

Philadelphia PA -- The last pencil is expected to take its final breathe sometime later this year. The handy pencil joined mankind during the days of ancient Egypt. Its numbers swelled to the trillions with the Baby Boom Generation. Now, they onl...

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Queen Orders All UFOs Shot Down

Funny story: Queen Orders All UFOs Shot Down

London-- Queen Elizabeth II has told Prime Minister Gordon Brown she wants any and all UFOs over the UK shot down. The queen has an insatiable curiosity about flying saucers and desperately wants to understand the puzzling phenomena. She also has...

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Kamikaze Birds Sabotage Wind Turbines

Funny story: Kamikaze Birds Sabotage Wind Turbines

Atlantic City NJ-- A flock of seagulls deliberately flew into a local wind-farm, killing themselves and crippling several wind turbines. Estimated damage is $1.5 million dollars. Dozens of decapitated seagulls fell to the ground around the farm,...

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Pennsylvanian Woman Executed For Overdue Library Book

Funny story: Pennsylvanian Woman Executed For Overdue Library Book

Harrisburg PA-- A Brookhaven woman was executed at midnight for an overdue library book. Michelle Critter, 45, went to her death in the electric chair crying softly. She was the first woman executed in Pennsylvania in over forty years. Ms. Crit...

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Breaking news…

Trump Jr. Says That He Always Wanted to Be Separated From His Parents

That's why he can't understand the consternation at the border with kids being taken from parents.
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