Kate and Wills to visit long-lost reptilian relatives

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

image for Kate and Wills to visit long-lost reptilian relatives
The Order of the Garter snake is one of William's cousins

Alberta - Genetic efforts to find the missing link between the royals and their four-legged cold-blooded relations are set for a big boost.

The couple will visit The Alberta Reptile and Amphibian Society on Thursday in an unscheduled trip to connect with foreign kith and kin.

The Society is at the cutting edge of human/reptilian DNA gathering which underpins much genome research into hybrid monstrosities.

Of particular interest to William might be advances in establishing the Order of the Garter Snake's spread into Windsor bloodlines.

Royal impostor William managed to blag his way into being awarded the chivalric gong a few years back after claiming he'd personally serviced the Queen to her complete satisfaction.

Other royal DNA research at TARAS includes links to the Corn Circle snake, the Kenyan Sandy Boa (or 'Obama') snake, the King and Lactating Milk snakes (don't ask!) and a notorious royal lounge lizard the Blue Tongued skink.

Kate meanwhile has relatives linked to the Bearded Dragon lizard if depilatory video footage of the Middleton women plucking their chins is anything to go by.

Camilla Fucker-Proles is sloth/Komodo lizard hybrid mutant.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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