Russian prisons offer package holidays including sun-beds!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Wednesday, 10 November 2010


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Russian prisons offer package holidays including sun-beds!
Russian prisons are certainly more luxurious than this 5* hotel and cheaper!

Russian prisons renowned for their disgraceful conditions are cleaning up their act.

The Russian government is even offering package holidays for "sickos" who want to enjoy the prison experience.

Infamous prisons such as the Butyrka prison are being refurbished with sauna landscapes, sunbeds, spa facilities, mudbaths and ultrasound equipment.

A spokesman for the Russian Prison Authorities, Volga Olga, gave the following press statement:

"Russia is a trend-setter, instead of fifty prisoners locked up all day in a cell 5 metres x 5 without toilet, baths and beds, now prisoners can enjoy a 'life of larry' during their time behind bars!"

"In fact we have been inundated with requests from thousands of clochards, alcoholics, junkies, the homeless and general scum wishing to enjoy our facilities instead of freezing their butts off under a Moscowite bridge!"

"Also we are offering package holidays to 'sicko' tourists wishing to enjoy the prison feeling and our facilities are much better (cockroach free) than those on offer in many Turkish seaside resorts and Blackpool, welcome to the new Russia" she said!

So if you're at pains to find an exciting holiday destination for 2011, just get in touch with the Russian Prison Authorities at: www.lockedupinacellwitharussianserialkiller.web!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more