BP Hires Wiley Coyote's Acme Corporation To Help With Oil Spill

Funny story written by rfreed

Monday, 7 June 2010

image for BP Hires Wiley Coyote's Acme Corporation To Help With Oil Spill
Wiley lets out a howl about the bucks he's making.

Acme Corporation is reporting a huge profit upswing this month. Acme is the chief supplier of underwater doo-dads for BP Corporation, the sponsors of what is now the largest oil spill ever. BP has been buying heavily from Acme in its attempts to up cap the renegade oil well.

Acme CEO Wiley Coyote, interviewed by Fly By Night Business Magazine, has expressed his delight at his companies good fortune.

"I use to be Acme's biggest customer of products. Their inventory has always been amazing. They had everything imaginable: long and short fused explosives, rocket cars, anvils, guided missiles, bazookas, spring loaded shoes and a great variety of specialty booby traps. We intend on maintaining that great tradition."

Acme has drawn criticism in the past for its products having dramatic flaws, such as parachutes that don't open or rockets with fuses that either burn down too quickly or not at all. Numerous lawsuits have been filed, many by Mr. Coyote himself about these faulty products. After having them all overturned by a questionable New Mexican judge named Yosemite Sam, Mr Coyote figured that it would be better to join than to fight them, especially after his career as a road runner hunter flopped.

Lawsuits against Acme may again be appearing on the horizon due to the failures BP has experienced trying to cap the Gulf well. With no New Mexican judge to protect them, Acme may be up against the wall, especially since a hot shot lawyer named R. Runner has been assigned to do the case.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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