Kennedy Stranglehold on Massachusetts, and Obama's 'Mandate' Taking on Water in Cape Cod Bay!

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Monday, 18 January 2010


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Camelot: 'The Gin & Bear It Years; Now Threatened in Massachusetts

Massachusetts voters have been energized as never before, as the special election to replace the ever pickled Senate Icon Ted Kennedy heads into the final hours before Tuesday's election.

On the playing field, Martha Coakley a weak kneed state Attorney General who's never prosecuted political corruption in the state, and feels she was anointed to take Ted's seat is faced by a state legislator, Scott Brown, who was down 30 points two weeks ago but is now said to be 4 points up, and that's BEFORE the Obamination hit town Sunday!

Coakley has spent most of her time at black tie fundraisers, including going to Washington to receive bags of cash from Dem pols, lobbyists from the Pharma industry, and over $1,000,000 from the union offspring of Acorn that counts among their members thousands of illegal aliens.

When asked why she wasn't out shaking hands with the constituents, she disdainfully replied, "What...stand out in front of Fenway Park in this weather to shake a few hands....?"

Lining up against Coakley are Boston and Massachusetts Icons, World Series Hero Curt Shilling, and Perennial Under Achiever Doug Flutie, who just never learned how to quit.

When questioned about Schilling's endorsement of Brown, Coakley blew him off calling him a "Yankee Fan." Flutie, whose last active play was a dropped kick extra point at Patriot's Stadium, to a standing ovation, said Coakley couln't carry his or Curt's jock strap, let alone sell popcorn and make change in Fenway Park.

Of equal import, is that the rank and file in the police department are solidly behind Brown....can you spell 'Amnesty' and a 'Free Pass to Child Abusers!'

The Kennedy mystique has held the democratically controlled state in its liberal grasp for time immemorial. The latest excuse to bankrupt its residents was the nation's first "one payer health insurance plan' brought in by Governor Deval Patrick, a Harvard buddy of Obama, and sometime speech writer for the former community activist, and intimidator. Deval, according to polls, is going to be lucky to finish his first term as governor.

Obama has modeled his health insurance plan after Massachusetts, and wags are already saying as soon as Deval gets thumped in the next election he will be knighted as US Health Care Czar. Deval, by the way, drives a Cadillac.

Small business owners in the Bay State were mandated to provide the state's health insurance program which would lower costs. To date, after two years, the system has a mammoth infrastructure of paid political hacks, has raised costs over 35% in two years, and left employers afraid to hire new employees lest the next increase put them out of business.

Said one Boston Area business man who is stocking up on razor wire, "Health care costs are now my largest overhead....and they are not a fixed cost...they go up at will!"

The Kennedy Mystique should have sunk, along with that Oldsmobile in Chappaqiddick, it should have sunk with the freedom fighters that drowned off the beaches of Cuba, it should have drowned along with the gin consumed by Ted and the boys during late night sex romps.

The Kennedy Mystique should have fallen down like the drunken escapades in some of Boston's finest restaurants when Teddy and Chris Dodd pawed the waitresses, it should have fallen to its knees like the chippies who visited the White House during the Camelot years to give 'comfort' to the ailing president, it definitely should have fallen by it's own hand, like Marylyn Monroe.

Said "Dexter' one former bell boy at a famous Hyannis Hotel, scene of the magic Kennedy years of the 60's...."when I worked here man, I saw a lot of chics getting screwed...but boy, little did I know those guys would get tired of all that straight sex and go out and F****everybody!"

Supporters for Scott Brown said that if he wins on Tuesday, there would be a massive pool party at the Sandy Pond Club in South Yarmouth, with drinks on the house and an appearance of Cape Favorite "Dirty Dick Doherty' and his Band doing his rendition of "SATISFACTION." (ed. note: you really had to be there in '61)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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