Michelle Already Shopping for Queen's Gifts for Historic April 1 Audience at Buckingham Palace!

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Friday, 6 March 2009

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Michelle Only Met One Queen Before, In Chicago, But Copes with Buying Gifts For State Visit!

Washington,DC/ Shopping News - Michelle Obama didn't waste any time in preparing for the Obamas' audience with Queen Elizabeth, scheduled for April 1 at Buckingham Palace, in conjunction with the G20 meeting discussing the world's dysfunction.

Obama's Chief of Staff, and the rest of the cabinet, were too wound up in preparing their taxes for the April 15th deadline, to notice the irony of the date. The Queen's Spokesman said that HM The Queen especially reserved this date for "entertaining fools", and was looking forward to the "diversion."

The first lady, and her designated shopper, Jeanmythinia Deliah Magumbo Johnson, descended on the local Georgetown Dollar Store to pick up some appropriate gifts for the Queen and her family.

Noting the Queen's propensity for stylish hats, Michelle picked a one size fits all NY Yankee Baseball cap, in a stunning pin stripe, marked down to $5.95.

Next was a George Foreman Grill, perfect for those days in the country after a pheasant shoot, and you want to do up a few pheasant burgers. It was not battery powered, however, and does require an electrical receptacle, a slight disadvantage when "out on the Moors." It was a steal at $15.95, regular price $39.95, but the box and instructions were missing.

Ever the thoughtful guest, Michelle found an exquisite set of 6 Trevis Plastic Tumblers with the Dallas Cowboys Logo on them. She said she thought the Queen was a "football" fan, and would enjoy them while tailgating at a Manchester Union game and "having a nip" with "the boys." Normally priced at $9 per tumbler, she picked the bargain for $4.95 for the six-pack, though one was cracked. "Save that one for Charlie," Michelle quipped!

Over in the pet section Michelle cooed over the faux Rhinestone collars, and bought the 3 remaining for the Queen's pack of Corgis. She thought the pink
lettered messages on the collars were adorable: "I"m in Heat", "I'm with Stupid" and "Don't Make Fun of My Ears!" would get a chortle from the ribald Queen. Three for a buck! Such a Deal!

Over in the discontinued adult book section she found a token gift for Prince Charles, "Sex for Dummies", and a consumer's guide on how to Price "Used Women." A total of $1.25 for the pair.

To round out the plethora of gifts representing the US in the best possible light, Michelle bought some plastic pictures frames to present H.M. The Queen with two portraits, one of rap star/hip/hop Queen LaTifah, and Barney Frank, The Mortgage Queen. "Class shows!" said the erudite First Lady.

Michelle and Oprah will be appearing on cover of the March Issue of "O", the media moguls personal magazine, prior to the trip to England. The publisher announced that the issue, will be "slightly oversized" to accommodate the egos of both Divas, for they are indeed, Queens in their own realms, or at least in their own minds. Plus their asses are huge, requiring a 3 tier pullout.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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