The leader of Germany is to undergo am operation to enlarge her neck. Mrs Merkle has long been seen as a bit of a hunchback amongst world leaders due to her sloped shoulders and chin resting on her tits.
A spokesman for the Chancellor said that Mrs Merkle would be receiving a transplant from a giraffe to "elongate" her neck.
Merkle's problems with her ape-like posture really became apparent after a meeting with George Bush a few years back. The 'Leader of the Free World' TM crept up behind her then clasped his hands around her neck causing her to shirk in fear. Ever since she has struggled to sit or stand in a normal position acceptable to humans.
"She's tried balancing books on her head, tantric yoga with that boring asshole Sting and even putting large copper coils around her neck like those women from certain tribes in Africa", said a close lesbian friend, "but alas, to no avail".
The operation will not come cheap and is expected to cost the German people it's entire Nazi memorabilia collection stored in the beloved St. Hitler museum in Berlin. A certain, supposedly anti-Semitic, Hollywood action movie star from the 1980's has expressed interest in purchasing the lot for his 'private collection'.
