Rome - (Holy Shit! Mess): A fleet of Vatican helicopters ferrying Pope Joe 'The Plumber' Ratzinger have all been grounded after the rotor blades of a Pontifical HH-3F Agusta Bell were vaporised in a fierce dogfight with a UFO over Berlin.
The incident occured last week when top Papal exorcist Monsignor Georg Gangswine (sic) was enroute to Pyongyang for a 'laying on of hands' healing session for dying North Korean leader Kim Jong Very Ill.
The extraterrestrial craft buzzed the holy chopper before attempting to engage a tractor beam and suck up its prey (pray? Sic!) some 25,000 feet over the remains of the old Berlin Hole-in-the-Wall.
Gangswine managed to bail out by parachute along with the helicopter crew. But the aircraft plunged to the ground, losing its tail engine and all 500 crates of 'medicinal' Vatican-endorsed Holy Communion Wine bound for Pyongyang Palace.
Papal surrogate nappy-changer Sister Ingrid Stampa is certifiable.
