World War Obsessives George Hedge and his aide Tony Blurt confirmed this morning that Africa was indeed the terrorist threat they have been waiting for all along. Misguided attempts at destroying Osama Been Hiding and the rest of the Arab World were declared as 'just practicing for the REAL WAR'.
'Now we have seen shocking stains' said Hedge, looking stressed and hesitant. Both Mr Hedge and Mr Blurt had been shocked on waking to find the source of their fears marked in their beds. Both found maps of Africa blemishing their crisp white sheets prompting cries of indignation from their wives.
Aides were immediately on hand to pass on messages to chambermaids telling them to keep quiet. There were worries about another Jesus shroud type scandal. Whether the two men were concerned of a religious war or just thought that someone was 'coming' was not known. Russia and China were kept on standby ready to offer troop support if an invasion was likely although they would be 'supporting their own countries.'
At a hastily conveened Press Conference, Mr Hedge declared that both himself and Mr Blurt had enough spunk to solve this new Africa threat.
A news reporter for the Daily Spume was later ejected after suggesting they were 'just a couple of wankers.'
