Heartened by recent Euro 2008 and Wimbledon triumphs Spain has set its sights on conquering England as its next prize.
Spanish secret agents, disguised as Spanish secret agents, infiltrated England during last week's Wimbledon and used the tennis match as a diversion to take a quick cab ride around town and spin in the London Eye to recon the situation.
Fairly reliable sources indicate that they have reported back to the Spanish crown that England is ripe for the picking and also brought back Amy Winehouse souvenir tee-shirts for all their immediate family members to everyone's delight.
One Spanish agent, Manuel Cuntquistador, is reported to have remained embedded into the comic underworld to act as a provocateur and intentionally distract British Policy Makers and mucky mucks to allow Spain to conspire to takeover England's role as the world leader for making ceramic thimbles and shot glasses with union jack emblems on them.
At last report an updated Spanish Armada of 130 ships has been sighted off the coast of France: 28 warships, twenty galleons, four galleys, four galleasses and a number of carracks and hulks, pretty much the same lot as before but with names that are impressive nonetheless.
While one would think Great Britain is a considerable sized island the Spanish had trouble navigating their fleet towards it last time around and somehow missed it, ending up sailing around it in a great widening circle until they got dizzy and crashed into Ireland after which England knocked them senseless.
At a press conference Prime Minister Brown says that according to confidential reports by cab drivers, souvenir shop keepers and wives of members of cabinet this time the danger is real. He cautions Brits not to let past success lull them into complacency.
"I call upon all able body men and women to stand fast for a possible invasion."
"Spanish mariners have been training hard by drinking beer and playing darts five times a week to keep a fine edge on for the final landing sortie."
Commander-In-Chief of the Fleet of the Royal Navy, Sir Mark Stanhope is unafraid and has not mobilized his forces. He plans on taking advantage of the poor navigational ability of the Spanish by using misdirection.
"We are going to paint a large white stripe on the on the coast of Ireland disguising it as the Cliffs of Dover instead."
