US Fairly Confident That Al Qaeda Leader was in That Library They Bombed

Funny story written by tzdan

Thursday, 1 May 2008

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"I am almost absolutely certain the insurgent was feeding the pigeons with those old people in that park."

MOGADISHU, SOMALIA - The US military is claiming to have killed Aden Ayro, the leader of Somalia's deadliest terrorist cell, in an overnight airstrike - or at least they're pretty sure he was somewhere was in that library they bombed.

"We got our man," said Gen. Marshall Major. "Of course, we have yet to identify a body, but we're fairly confident his corpse is buried under that pile of rubble somewhere.

"However, I can say with absolute certainty that he was not in that terrorist training camp down the road that we were not actually trying to hit."

Ayro is the latest in a number of high-profile insurgents which the US military alleges to have killed in recent months. They also claim to have eliminated the leaders of a number of insurgent groups in the previous airstrikes of a Pakistani hospital, an Iraqi elementary school, and a Lebanese daycare.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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