Boy from India has world's biggest zit removed

Funny story written by Dr Edward Maxwell

Monday, 24 March 2008


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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image for Boy from India has world's biggest zit removed
The zit juices have been found acceptable for use in Indian toothpaste products

A boy with a zit large enough to be considered an environmental threat to others has had the pus-filled tumour removed, authorities in India said today.

Raj "Two Head" Hoholi, of little note, is a 16 year old boy from Bombay who had possessed perhaps the world's biggest facial pustule until it was lanced today. Authorities recommended the removal of Hoholi's enormous, gargantuan, super-sized pocket of pus due to safety concerns. There were fears that the zit might spontaneously erupt and shoot a geyser of whitish pus with the consistency of toothpaste at passersby, causing injury.

Hoholi's monkey was removed from his shoulder shortly before a firecracker was placed on the unwieldy zit. The firecracker's fuse was lit and emergency workers fell back quickly. After a few seconds, the firecracker exploded. Hoholi, whose zit shielded him from experiencing any pain, stood silently for a few moments as it became clear to the authorities that the zit had not been breached.

Authorities were expecting a second attempt when Hoholi suddenly found the entire situation so amusing he smiled; he was starting to laugh when the zit suddenly exploded, showering dozens of people 30 meters away with whitish ooze.

A fun time was had by all. Hoholi's new facial crater will be filled in with a putty compound and he is expected to resume his normal Indian short-penis life with no long-term ill effects.

Author's note: I cannot help wondering why men from India have such small penises but such large facial protuberances. Perhaps an author of lesser note will research the subject some day.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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