Written by Chuck Swann

Monday, 25 June 2007

image for Baby Dinosaur Runs Rampant In Supermarket
Fresh Meat: The Baby Bites Back?

A real life baby dinosaur has run amok in a local northwest supermarket, killing one man and terrorizing hundreds of innocent bystanders, and security cameras captured the entire ordeal as it unfolded.

It turns out that the baby dinosaur, a pint-sized Tyrannosaurus Rex, had recently hatched and was being delivered back to the Cretaceous Period by a man who referred to himself simply as "Status", with the aid of an opportune "Flux Core" or dimensional porthole. When pressed for a more accurate account of this unusual occurrence, he immediately declined further comment.

Thanks to our diligence, and with the cooperation of local market's owner, we are now able to show you this shocking video footage.

It is interesting to note that towards the end of this footage, the man in question named Status, was seen shoplifting food from the store after he had returned the baby dinosaur back to its proper dimension. Criminal charges are pending.

The owner of the supermarket, Mario, was later quoted as saying: "I can't have baby dinosaurs killing customers. This is bad for business. Why can't the local government just come clean and tell people what's really going on?"

It looks like we may be one step closer to the truth thanks to advanced video technology and people like you, Mario.

Chuck Swann

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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