Freezing German farm cats give farmer filthy looks and 'down tools!'

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Wednesday, 2 December 2020

image for Freezing German farm cats give farmer filthy looks and 'down tools!'
"I'll show you who's the boss! No warm butt, no dead mice!"

(NOT EDITED) Eifel, Germany: A bunch of shivering farm cats, not allowed into the farmhouse because they should be doing their jobs; hunting mice in the barn, and outside, have decided to go on strike because their butts are too cold!

Farm cats can have mean methods of showing their owners they are not happy with their living quarters. These particular cats, who get fed regularly, have decided to 'down tools' and let the mice run free unless the farmer provides a terrace-heater in the barn, so they can warm their rear-ends!

Another method of getting attention, which these farm cats are explicitly clever at, is perching themselves on a higher level, a table for example, and giving their owners filthy looks every time they pop inside the warm farm house.

The farmer's wife, who feeds the cats, sometimes feels a bit sorry for her 12 cats, but rules are rules, and although she has a guilty conscience, now and then, the cats must remain outside, otherwise they would never lift their lazy butts again!

The farmer needed to come to an agreement with his cats because mice were popping out their heads in every corner of the barn, and nibbling away at the winter feed stored for his cows. He placed a terrace-heater in one corner, let the thing glow for an hour in the morning, and an hour in the evening.

His cats now gather around the heater, feed their hungry bellies, and decided, unanimously, to go back to their nocturnal duties, hunting mice. In the morning, after a hard night's hunt, they all cuddle up around the heater for a rest waiting for the winter sun to rise. After a quick cat-nap, and feed, they trot out for a laze in the sunshine. Before dark, they return to their warm barn for another quick cat-nap. Refreshed, and fit for work, they keep themselves warm all through the night hunting mice! A win-win scenario; Meow!

It's a 'dog's life' being a farm cat in cold Germany, poor things!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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