Cat fighting not forbidden in German backgarden's!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Friday, 25 September 2020

image for Cat fighting not forbidden in German backgarden's!
A trainee 'FELINE FIGHTER' nicknamed 'BIG MIKE' preparing for her first battle against Tom!

(NOT EDITED) After a series of aggressive cats having 'pops' at each other in a German back garden in Iserlohn, a clever pit-bull owner thought, "I can make mega-Marks, sorry Euros, out of these cats 'popping' at each other."

So, he built himself a cage, caught a couple of aggressive felines, and Tom cats, and spoilt them with tins of Sheba and organic milk. He noticed felines were terribly aggressive when in heat, and Tom cats had no chance against them. After recruiting his top 'fighters', he invited his mates around, all pit bull owners, to have a bet on his 'FIGHTING FELINES' against his Tom cats. His mates, and other punters, couldn't tell the difference between the felines and Toms, so they just betted on, who looked the strongest, and lost mega-Euro's; dummkopfs!

After several fights, neighbors' started to complain about the noise next door, and parked cars in front of their driveways! Screeching, yowling, screaming, not meowing, or purring, could be heard all down the street! So, they informed the local RSPCA, who sent a task force in to find out what all the loud babble was about!

Local RSPCA confirmed the fact that illegal 'cat-fighting' was taking place, but were powerless to stop it because only dog-fighting is forbidden, but cats, well nobody ever thought of rearing 'Mike Tyson Cats!'

Luckily, the local council clamped down on the fighting because of complaints about the noise. The clever pit bull owner decided to take his 'FIGHTING FELINES', and Toms, to a derelict warehouse, and only offered his punters nocturnal fights because that's when cats are most active. However, getting up in the middle of the night to lose bets on felines thumping Toms wore off pretty quickly. His 'FELINE FIGHTERS' are now retired, and mostly pregnant, after accepting their role in life is not quite the same as Praying Mantas.

Tom & Co, after getting their 'lights punched out', then proceeded with real business, and revenge was terribly sweet; MEOUW!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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