THE year 2020 has been officially postponed.
A top level meeting of all world leaders at the United Nations in New York, decided that, after a disastrous start to the new decade, it was best just to start it again next year.
Secretary General of the UN, Antonio Guterres, said that after considering all the data about the first 14 weeks, there was no option but to write it off.
He said: “It started with some of the worst hangovers ever being reported, then almost everyone gave up their New Year resolutions before the end of January.
“Climate change accelerated at unprecedented pace in February, along with a series of sharp dips in the economic data.”
“However, there has been one factor, above all else, that has led to this decision, and I’m sure everyone knows what it is – yes, the production of a second Mary Poppins sequel.”
“The plan to make Mary Poppins Please Come Back, We Need You Again was the final straw.”
Asked if this would cause confusion with the numbers, he said: “Not really, we will just combine the years so the first day of next year will be January 1st 2020/21.”
As for the remaining months of 2020, the Secretary General told everyone just to ‘take the year off”.
“We’ve had a good run. For over two thousand years, we’ve got it right. That run had to end some time.”
“Blame the dolly with the brolly.”