Man Was Captivated By Air Hostess During Airline Onboard Safety Check

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 15 September 2019

image for Man Was Captivated By Air Hostess During Airline Onboard Safety Check
The man (baldpatch) regards stewardess as she brings the trolley round

A male passenger on an airline flight from Helsinki to Bangkok at the weekend has revealed how he was "mesmerised" by one of the flight's stewardesses during the airline safety check procedure at the commencement of his journey.

The passenger, 56, said that he never pays any attention to the pointless miming exercise as he has never been involved in a situation where the safety procedure might prove useful.

This time was different, however.

Travelling on Finnair, the Englishman said:

"The stewardess was a very pretty Finnish lady with blond hair hacked into a wedge at one side, and very sexy. She was of medium height, but wore shoes that made her taller, and that accentuated her calf muscles."

The woman, he said, executed the safety procedure in such an interesting and sexy manner that he became fixated on her, and he felt as if the whole routine had been designed with him in mind.

He watched closely as she fitted the yellow oxygen mask over her mouth, and remembered, from somewhere, that you have to put your own mask on before helping others.

He moved uncomfortably in his seat as she slid the lifejacket over her head, adjusted the strap around her curvaceous waistline, and raised the little yellow whistle to her puckered glossy lips.

And when, eyes fixed upon the man, she indicated where the emergency exits were, it was - to him - as if she were indicating with a coy,
knowing smile, the way to some secret 'onboard bedroom', to which he was being summoned.

Later, after the fully aroused passenger had been led from the plane by police, the stewardess told an officer, in perfect English, and with a twinkle in her eye:

"I'm afraid I haven't the faintest idea what he's talking about."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more