The White House, Exclusive to The Spoof. Unidentified sources close to Donald J. Trump have informed The Spoof that the president has ordered the execution of two of his closest advisers, whom Trump considers responsible for the disaster at the failed Hanoi Summit.
The victims are Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, who led the useless negotiations prior to the dismal failure at Hanoi, and National Security Adviser John Bolton, who vigorously opposed any further meetings with the North Korean dictator, Kim Jong-un.
The first word about the executions came in a short tweet from the president, sent moments after it was learned that Kim had ordered similar executions.
When asked how Trump could order an execution without an indictment and a trial, a White House aide summed up the argument in two words, "Executive Orders."