Kim Jong-un brushes go on sale in run-up to Christmas

Written by Anne of Cleavage

Tuesday, 2 December 2014

image for Kim Jong-un brushes go on sale in run-up to Christmas
"Stop rubbing my head on the floor or I will declare war on you!"

North Korea has entered the foreign exports market with a new product set to beat all economic sanctions. The Kim Jong-un brush looks just like the supreme leader of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, complete with a chubby handle, an unbelievably round head and a no-nonsense brush on the top of the head that gets rid of all rubbish.

It even plays a musical jingle as you use it, which sounds faintly like the National Korean national anthem and marching boots.

Early reviews in the Asian markets, where the brush has been on sale for a few weeks, have been mixed. While many people have expressed great excitement at the product, a few have complained that their brush disappeared and was not heard from for a few weeks, then mysteriously reappeared but moves more slowly than before. One user reported that after acquiring the brush, one of his family members was mysteriously killed by a pack of dogs, though it is not clear how this had anything to do with the Kim Jong-un brush.

The North Korean government, which manufactures and sells the Kim Jong-un brush, has announced that it will also produce cheaper Barrack Obama and David Cameron brushes, though it warns that these will be made from inferior materials and will be likely to break easily.

Consumers across Europe and America have expressed great excitement at the prospect of finding a Kim Jong-un brush in their Christmas stocking.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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