Venus adds a touch of euthanasia to Thursday's somber solar eclipse

Funny story written by queen mudder

Sunday, 19 October 2014

image for Venus adds a touch of euthanasia to Thursday's somber solar eclipse
The eclipse is like a funerary vortex stalking death cult fanatics

The Cosmos - A trainwreck astrological alignment straddles the Cosmos this Thursday when the Sun, Moon and Venus all pile into Scorpio triggering a solar eclipse in the Zodiac's Sign of Death.

Skywatchers liken the aspect to a morphine/cocaine highball administered via the jugular when karmic life support fails.

They stress the eclipse's shadow path will transit much of the Scorpio-ruled Middle East where murderous Islamic State death cult fanatics are baying for blood like born-again Nazis.

Thursday's stars are likely to see ruptures in the group's own hierarchy with a spate of jihaddi backstabbings predicted in the Iraqi town of Mosul.

The rampage may then spread into Islamic State's own internal affairs department where the Scorpio eclipse unearths a huge - some say disgusting! - schizm between indiginous Iraqi/Syrian killers and their imported European wannabe counterparts.

Commenting on the eclipse a spokesperson for internet spread betters Aintgottaprayer.con said, "These fucking bastards have got it coming" before setting odds of 25/1 for their imminent annihilation.

You can blame Comet Siding's Martian flypast if things get too frantic in the upcoming daze.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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