LONDON-In what is being hailed as the most significant news since the death of Osama Bin Laden several months ago, which in itself was the biggest news since the royal wedding a couple days before that, the royal couple has dumbfounded scientists the world over by stumbling upon a legitimate cure for cancer.
"We honestly have no idea how they did it," said cancer researcher Dr. Drew Yulipsi. "We've been working on this thing our entire lives. Years and years of research and millions upon millions of dollars later, and what happens? They come back from their little honeymoon and just throw this thing in our laps."
Nobody has any clue how Prince William and his bride Kate managed such a feat. One minute they're this happy newlywed couple with a world of possibilities before them, the next, they've baffled scientists the world over with what appears to be a real and promising cure for the most widespread and deadly ailment the world has ever seen.
One thing is for certain though: all eyes are on the royal couple and what they plan to do next.
As of press time, President Obama was preparing to make a statement to the world at large, and rumor is he's made contact with an advanced alien civilization of adorable, teddy bear-like creatures.
