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Funny satire stories about cancer

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Funny story: Man Left Job After One Day As He Wanted To Kill Two Of His Colleagues

Man Left Job After One Day As He Wanted To Kill Two Of His Colleagues

A man has revealed how, many moons ago, he was left with no choice but to abandon a position of employment after just one day in the job, when he realised that, by turning up at his work on the second day might result in the deaths of two of his coll...

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Funny story: WebMD Algorithms Prove Unflappable on Company's Covid-19 Self Diagnosis Site

WebMD Algorithms Prove Unflappable on Company's Covid-19 Self Diagnosis Site

(Elgin, Illinois) Since its founding in 1998, WebMD has been a valuable medical website to educate its visitors on a myriad of health-related topics. From learning about Morgellons Disease to understanding if your body is low on Hyaluronic Acid, WebM...

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Funny story: Terminally Ill Patients Resentful They’re Not Dying From Covid-19

Terminally Ill Patients Resentful They’re Not Dying From Covid-19

(San Louis Obispo, California) The endless media bombardment that has pummeled the public from the Coronavirus pandemic, has overwhelmed the majority of us. Between continual news updates from social media, a cacophony of online broadcasts, and daily...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Relieved to Just Have Cancer

Nashville Man Relieved to Just Have Cancer

After experiencing coughing and fatigue, Clinton Toler of Nashville, Tennessee, found a clinic able to test him for COVID-19, but learned, to his immense relief, that he only had cancer. “I was sure it was coronavirus,” he said, shaking his head t...

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Funny story: Smoker Approached By Council About Potholes

Smoker Approached By Council About Potholes

A man who is known to have lung cancer caused by more than 60 years of smoking cigarettes, has been contacted by his local council, who asked if he might be amenable to letting them have some of his tar to fix the potholes in the city's roads. Dav...

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Funny story: Robert Mugabe Cancer Verdict Sparks Wild Celebrations In Zimbabwe

Robert Mugabe Cancer Verdict Sparks Wild Celebrations In Zimbabwe

Results of an autopsy performed after the death of Robert Mugabe, the Zimbabwe prime minister, then president, who had ruled over the country with an iron fist since 1980, proved the dictator was riddled with cancer, sparking wild celebrations throug...

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Funny story: Health-Conscious Trucker Starts Smoking Standing Up

Health-Conscious Trucker Starts Smoking Standing Up

Heeding warnings that sitting is the new smoking, Henry Larkins,, a long-distance truck driver living in Nashville, Tennessee, ditched his habit of smoking cigarettes while sitting on his back porch and now instead smokes while standing up. "I kno...

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Funny story: Black Death On Its Way Back

Black Death On Its Way Back

The Black Death, the devastating pandemic that struck terror into countries all across the continents of Asia and Europe during the fourteenth century, killing around 100million people, is back amongst us, and set to take its toll once more. This...

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Funny story: Man Read Alexander Solzhenitsyn's 'Cancer Ward', And Began To Feel 'Ropey'

Man Read Alexander Solzhenitsyn's 'Cancer Ward', And Began To Feel 'Ropey'

A man who read a copy of the Alexander Solzhenitsyn classic, 'Cancer Ward', has revealed how, whilst reading the book, he started to feel distinctly unwell. The book, a classic amongst Russian literature, was written in 1966, and was censored by t...

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Funny story: Vaping Soon To Be A Thing Of The Past

Vaping Soon To Be A Thing Of The Past

Vaping - the practice of 'electronic smoking' - is shortly to be a 'thing of the past', according to researchers at a company in Dublin. Electronic vapers are viewed by many people as disgusting devices through which 'flavored vapor' is sucked int...

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Funny story: St. Jude Children’s Hospital To Host “Little Miss Cancer Pageant”

St. Jude Children’s Hospital To Host “Little Miss Cancer Pageant”

Earlier today, St. Jude Children’s Hospital confirmed that they will be debuting their much anticipated “Little Miss Cancer Pageant”. Children under the age of sixteen are encouraged to sign up prior to the December 1st deadline, so long as they are...

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Funny story: More "Daily Mail" Things From Day-To-Day Life Which Cause Cancer

More "Daily Mail" Things From Day-To-Day Life Which Cause Cancer

Back and to the Left news has today teamed up with the Daily Mail to bring you the top five surprising signs you definitely have cancer: 1. Being a “reomoaner”: Does the fact that the glorious new dawn of Brexit cause you to complain and bleat lik...

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Funny story: Dook University Develops Prescription Cigarette

Dook University Develops Prescription Cigarette

Durham, NC [PP] -- On Monday, Dook University released what may be a first for modern science, a therapeutic cigarette which could very well cure some forms of cancer. Dr. Ralph Jones, director of research says, "This is groundbreaking research, t...

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Funny story: Is Cancer Really That Bad?

Is Cancer Really That Bad?

Los Angeles, California - Firefly, produced by Joss Whedon, first aired on Fox in the September of 2002, and is wildly regarded by many to be one of the greatest Science Fiction television shows ever created, earning rank #5 in TV Guide's 2013 list o...

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Funny story: No Longer Bringing Home The Bacon

No Longer Bringing Home The Bacon

Processed meat causes cancer! We were so shocked when we read (skimmed it and looked for pictures) the report, through a haze of Shisha smoke, we were outraged. We quickly like two cigarettes each to calm our nerves and called up the most sciency sci...

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Funny story: Michael Douglas cancer advice rejected by JP Morgan boss

Michael Douglas cancer advice rejected by JP Morgan boss

New York - The Oscar-winning producer of One Blue Over The Cuckoo's Nest famously blamed his now-cured throat cancer on a bout of dodgy oral sex in a 'tasteless' quip that wife Catherine Zeta Jones said had left her feeling uncomfortable and down in...

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Funny story: Fart smellers may be smart fellas after all: smelling farts can reduce disease, study

Fart smellers may be smart fellas after all: smelling farts can reduce disease, study

HARFOLD, Vt - A new study at Harfold State College suggests that exposure to hydrogen sulfide gas, that is, what your body produces as bacteria breaks down food, could prevent mitochondria damage. This is good news for the Miss Harfold Diner which...

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