Vote for Rand Paul or Southern Boys Will Step on Your Head

Written by P.M. Wortham

Tuesday, 26 October 2010

image for Vote for Rand Paul or Southern Boys Will Step on Your Head
Peaceful activists before the boot stomping began

Republican nominee Rand Paul finally apologized to the protestor seen in a UTube video with a Rand supporter stepping on a woman's head and pinning her to the ground. The apology came after the video became viral and Paul was forced to make a statement.

One of Paul's entourage suggested to the press that the video makes the incident which took place on a campaign stop in Kentucky, "Look worse than it actually was". Buster Bawlsacks, unofficial vigilante chief of Paul's Kentucky security detail says, "From our perspective, that commie liberal, baby killer was already laying on the ground in a high foot traffic area just begging to be accidentally stepped on. And she got what she asked for."

Lauren Valle, 23 year old female activist was the victim in the case, while Bawlsacks dismissed the idea of the action being anything more than protection of his preferred candidate. "Hell, if they want to serve in the military, carry guns and be tough as men, then a boot to the head ain't no big deal."

The woman was later treated and released while Rand portrayed the incident as "incredibly unfortunate".

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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