Written by Gay Larry

Sunday, 17 October 2010

image for Gay Man Unable To Wash Bit Of Brown Stuff From The End Of His Cock
Nee-naw-nee-naw

A New Mexico homosexual was at the centre of local attention today when he called the emergency services number to request immediate assistance from medics when it became clear that he was unable to remove a small fragment of excrement from the end of his penis.

Larry Sabu, 20, phoned the Royal Las Cruces Hospital last night about 11pm. He told the hospital switchboard that the offending item had become stuck to the top of his helmet after a particularly rough gay sex session with one of his neighbours, a fat man who looks a bit like Roy Orbison.

Sabu, 20, told us:

"The lardy guy next door invited me around to look at his 'teddy bear', which I, as a rampant gay man, took to mean his hairy ass. Sure enough, when I got round there, he was naked from the waist down, and presented me with a ringpiece that I felt obliged to fill, as far as I was able."

Larry then proceeded to do what uphill gardeners do, but later regretted being so spontaneous. He went on "I should have got him to clean his arse first. I was left with a dirty great big nugget of shite on my cock, that has proved difficult to dislodge."

Doctors at the medical facility used a strong carbolic solution to dissolve the excrement, and later told us the lump had been so stubborn because it appeared that its owner had been fed on a diet of jalapenos.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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