In a shock move announced today, the new Governor of California has sensationally banned heterosexual marriage.
Speaking from his office Governor Dwane Chippengorge said "Look these Goddam straight people with their perverted ideas have been getting away with it for too long. No more heterosexual marriage and that's it. It's an abomination. They'll be wanting to marry their pets next."
The bold move has sparked a mixed reaction throughout the state. Bride to be Thelma Offenberg, six months pregnant, due to be married to Guy Chuckberry on Saturday was seen weeping into her wedding dress, whilst Guy was seen out celebrating with his friends and overheard saying that he'd had a "miracle escape from a life of misery and despair." and "I love you, you're my best friend." before finally being carried home at 3am.
Gay celebrities started an impromptu conga down a high street in Los Angeles which only stopped when the man at the back got accused of outraging public decency.
When US President Barack Obama was asked if the move was legal he commented "This is nothing - You wait til you see what I've got planned for white people."
More as we get it.
