In a surprise pick that has his political buddies nodding their heads in agreement, President Barack Obama has named Tiger Woods as head of the Department of Transportation.
With Senate Leader Harry Reid and House Spokesperson Nancy Pelosi along beside Obama and Tiger, the President announced that Tiger has decided to forego the next season of playing professional golf and needed some time to think about golf and politics and women.
"Tiger Woods has been an example to us all in the way he conducts himself in commercials and is there a better driver in the world, I think not", stated Obama.
"Oh John Daly may drive it further, but not with the accuracy of Tiger."
"I hit that fireplug, didn't I?', laughed the new Head of Transportation, as more than half of Congress came to it's feet and applauded until the sign went down.
"Probably should have used more backspin!"
"Applause!!"
"Had to take $164.00 penalty!"
"Applause" (But weak)
"Ahem", the President came back on. "As I was saying...."
"Applause!" (few claps)
"Somebody shut that thing off!"