Former President Bill Clinton announced today they he is forming a counseling service and treatment facility for politicians who have behaved in what he termed "reprehensible sexual conduct of the sort I myself perpetrated, and then lied about, with that woman-Monica Lewinsky."
"In fact, I believe my extramarital dalliances with that particular intern were wrong-because she was what we skirt-chasers call a "talker" and, you know, she was a bit on the chunky side too. But the experience makes me all the more able to help and counsel other politicians who have been caught with their pants down. On the other hand, I now see that even JFK had his own intern," the loquacious Clinton added.
The name of Clinton's organization is C.A.D.-short for Counseling Adulterers and Deceivers. The ex-chief executive says the fact that he was impeached adds to his credibility as a guy who knows how to overcome a major cheating scandal.
Clinton says his clinic will accept sinners of both sexes, both political parties-and both heterosexuals and homosexuals.
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton issued a printed statement saying, "That's finally it! I want a divorce! It was just a fake marriage anyway!"