LOUISVILLE - The 135th running of The Kentucky Derby was won by a relatively unknown gelding horse from Gallup, New Mexico, named Shoot The Bird.
The odds on Shoot The Bird winning the Kentucky Derby were 500 to 1.
Winning jockey Calbert Bordello, who looks a little bit like Mayberry's Ernest T. Bass, said that Shoot The Bird was running dead last in 20th place with about 1/16 of a mile to go when all of a sudden he took off as if he was a professional baseball batter on steroids.
Within a matter of about 12 seconds Shoot The Bird went from last to first. When he crossed the finish line the rest of the horses looked like ants behind him.
The second place horse Squatter of The Euphrates was about 78 lengths behind him. When Bordello was asked how he was able to accomplish this amazing feat he smiled and said that he just talked to his horse.
When asked what in the world he said to his Derby winning horse, Bordello simply grinned and said that when he was in 19th place he just leaned over and whispered in Shoot The Bird's ear that if he didn't pick up the pace that after the race he would just ride him directly over to the Alpo Factory.
Bordello, who, at 3 foot 7 inches is one of the shortest racing jockeys in the horseracing business said that as soon as he mentioned the word Alpo Birdy took off like a scalded dog.
He laughed and said that Birdy took off so darn fast that he said that it was all he could do to hold on.
Cal The Pal got kind of embarrassed and remarked that no one had any idea how close he actually came to losing his riding britches.
Bordello, who is 51-years-old, is the second oldest jockey in the history of horseracing.
The only other jockey who was older than Bordello was Billy "Bitty Buns" Maytubby, who won the Kentucky Derby on board Sea Muffin in 1948. Maytubby was 87-years-old at the time of his Derby victory.
Bordello said that he was actually older than the two jockeys who came in second and third combined.
The two jockeys are Francisco "The Cisco Kid" Calcutta who is 16, and Sigfrido "The Cisco Kid" Labios de Vaca who will turn 12 next month.
Shoot The Bird's trainer Bubba "Cow Chip" Woodlips who was on crutches due to a horseshoe tossing accident that he suffered seven months ago said that he had never seen Shoot The Bird run so fast.
When Woodlips was told that Bordello had whispered in Birdy's ear the word Alpo, Woodlips laughed and said that he had figured as much.
He then stated that the last race that Birdy had won was The Juneau Derby up in Alaska.
Bordello had confided to him that half way through the race, when Birdy was running last he leaned over and mentioned the words Elmer's Glue.
Birdy amazingly jumped into the lead in about 4.6 seconds.
The owners of Shoot The Bird, Mr. and Mrs. Cordell Bonnyclabber could not make it to the Kentucky Derby as they were back in Gallup, New Mexico, trying to raise bail for Mrs. Bonnyclabber's 97-year-old mother Kayleen "Tabacco Chaw" Bilbo.
Mrs. Bonnyclabber said that it was really no big deal and that it was just a little kidnapping misunderstanding.
When jockey Calbert Bordello was asked for his thoughts on winning his second Kentucky Derby he just smiled and started hollering that he was going out after the festivities and buying Birdy the biggest horse treat he can find.
Bordello who, an hour after the race was still smiling from ear to ear was asked how he felt financially. He put down his Mint Julep drink and piece of cornbread and said that it felt really good to be rich.
When asked how much he got paid, Bordello replied that he only got paid $14 an hour.
He then said that he took most of the money that he had saved up throughout the years and he bet it all on Shoot The Bird to win.
Shoot The Bird paid, the second largest payoff in Derby history at $103.20 for a $2 bet. He was asked how much he had bet. Bordello smiled, took a drink out of Woodlips Southern Comfort bottle, and stated that he had bet $20,000.
And so his bet paid him $1,032,000. When asked what he was going to do with all that money, Bordello winked and said that he was going to use the money to repair his trailer located at The Montezuma's Revenge Trailer Park in Gallup, New Mexico.
