Dubai's Shaikh McTomb-Raider desperate to buy awesome Kentucky Derby contender Big Brown

Funny story written by queen mudder

Saturday, 26 April 2008

image for Dubai's Shaikh McTomb-Raider desperate to buy awesome Kentucky Derby contender Big Brown
The smell of sweet light crude sure smells even sweeter at $130 a-barrel when McTomb-Raider is set to pounce

Louisville, Kentucky - (Thoroughbred Mess): A couple of former Off-the-Wall-Street investment bankers-turned racing fanatics are chuffed to bits this weekend.

Somebody, it is rumored, desperately wants their red-hot 2008 Kentucky Derby favorite Big Brown and has put $20 million on the table.

"Twenty mill? That's all? Kinda low opening bid, considering," was EAH Stables' Michael Iavarone's reaction to the offer by Dubai's Shaikh Mohammed McTomb-Raider.

The snaggly-eyebrowed Shaikh is bidding to snap up the unbeaten three year-old Florida Derby 2008 winner and have his own jockey carry his distictive maroon and white colors to glory at Louisville next Saturday.

A few Breeders Cup successes have whetted his appetite for the ultimate racing trophy in the US - a Kentucky Derby winner.

EAH Stables partner - via parent company International Equine Acquisitions Holdings - Richard J Schiavo apparently is keen to try an old Gordon Gekko-esque stratagem.

"Yeah, let him sweat a bit longer. When the price of crude crosses the $130-a-barrel threshold - which it surely will come April 30/May 1st - then we'll squeeze another five mill from him.... and throw in a couple of those 'magic' silver horseshoes!"

The thoroughbred investors along with partners Paul Pompa Jr and others have seen their unbeated son of Boundary scale the bookies' odds after some seriously classy workouts over 5-6 furlongs this week.

But they also know that while the ten furlong Florida victory was remarkable for a colt sired by a champion sprinter the redoutable challengers Pyro, Colonel John, Tale Of Ekati and Gayego could all too easily turn a pipedream belly-up.

"Ultimately at this stage of the equine poker game it's all down to bluff," Schiavo told reporters today.

"We're acting kinda neutral in the courtship negotiations. But I can smell that sweet light crude smell at $130, maybe $135 a-barrel and know the old Shaikh will bite just because he can't help himself."

William Stamps Farish III is on for 10%.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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