Written by bschooled

Sunday, 19 April 2009

image for Man Strongly Opposed to Pyramid-Selling Schemes

Chicago, Illinois- A local man is speaking out against multi-level marketing (MLM), claiming a pyramid selling scheme he was about to invest in was a hoax.

"From now on, I will only buy pyramids from reputable companies", says Louie Bidwell, an avid collector of ancient Egyptian artifacts who feels he was tricked into attending an MLM seminar earlier this year.

Louie fell victim to the scam after finally saving enough money to expand the impressive collection of antiquities he had accumulated over the past decade.

"Ever since I made out with a girl dressed as Cleopatra at Frank's Halloween party in 1998, I have been infatuated with ancient Egyptians", he explained. "I was in the process of building a miniature land of the Nile in my backyard, but since I already had more than enough burial tombs and hieroglyphic drawings, I figured it was a good time to focus on the Sphinx and pyramid side of things."

Louie first became interested in the idea after being approached by a customer at the swarma restaurant where he works.

"This guy I didn't recognize came in and ordered the lamb and couscous special. While he was waiting for his order, he began talking about some pyramid selling business he was involved in. Since I had been wanting a pyramid for quite a while but just didn't know where I could get a good deal, I took it as a sign from God and agreed to go to the information session."

After walking out on his job because his boss wouldn't give him the night off, he showed up for the meeting only to find out they weren't actually selling pyramids.

"I felt mislead. It was kind of like false advertising, you know? Here I was, thinking my dream was about to become a reality, and within 30 minutes I realized I had been duped. Luckily my boss gave me my job back, or I have no idea what I would have done."

Louis is hoping his experience will help others who find themselves in a similar situation.

"Looking back, had I decided to collect King Tut masks or miniature Pharoahs, maybe this wouldn't have happened. But, I can't dwell on the past, and if I can save just one person from going through the same ordeal, I guess it will have all been worth it."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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