Gorgeous Models Riot In New York City

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Sunday, 15 March 2009

image for Gorgeous Models Riot In New York City
The stolen lipstick that is believed to have caused the pandemonium

MANHATTAN - Hundreds of young women waiting in line to audition for the reality show "America's Next Top Model" suddenly turned into an uncontrolled mob, a good looking mob, but a mob nonetheless.

Twenty-three year old, Tiffany Laganetti who lives in the Bronx said she was standing in line at the Regis Philbin Hotel in downtown Manhattan, listening to Katy Perry on her iPod when all of a sudden several girls behind her starting pushing and cussing.

One of the girls apparently accused another one of either stealing her boyfriend, her lipstick, or her look.

An NYPD police officer Tony Botticelli stated that a total of 47 women were arrested and 317 reported everything from leg scratches, arm bruises, and hickeys to smeared eyeshadow, chipped fingernails, and torn pantyhose.

One girl said that she was actually bitten by another girl on her tongue. Botticelli said that it was not a pretty sight.

He then thought about it and said, "Well let me rephrase that. The sight was actually quite pretty, what with all of these gorgeous models and beautiful model wannabes and all, but what the girls was (sic) doing was really one friggin' messed up hellacious mess."

The two block area was literally littered with high heel shoes, miniskirts, halter tops, bras, earrings, panties, diaphragms, nipple rings, IUD's, and a vibartor. An officer said that it kind of reminded him of what Madonna's apartment would probably look like.

Almost all of the 97 NYPD officers who were covering the crowd ended up with lipstick stains, eyeliner smears, and eye mascara smudges on their police uniforms.

Officer Botticelli remarked that he was going to have to do some major explaining to his Jamaican-born wife as to how he ended up with three diffferent colors of lipstick on his collar.

In a related story. Fox has jumped on the incident and will be approaching "America's Next Top Model" host Tyra Banks about a new reality show, "America's Next Top Model - The Audition Catfights."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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