Bush and Blair to record charity duet

Funny story written by Harry Porter

Tuesday, 15 June 2004

image for Bush and Blair to record charity duet
Mr Blair - A moving guitar break

ABBEY ROAD STUDIOS, LONDON - George Bush and Tony Blair are to record a duet to aid the people of Iraq.

The stunning revelation is bound to be viewed as a cynical election ploy by both world leaders but it will be a dramatic first on the global political stage.

According to inside sources, President Bush and Prime Minister Blair are planning a version of ‘Two Little Boys', a song virtually unknown in the States but a monster smash in the UK for Rolf Harris in December 1969.

The leaders will record their parts on their respective sides of the Atlantic but the storyboard for the video has already been finalised.

President Bush will be filmed in a ranch setting, wearing a Stetson and sheepskin jacket, gazing up at rain-laden clouds, looking "pensive but determined".

Prime Minister Blair will be filmed walking in casual wear beneath the storm-lashed white cliffs of Dover with his wife, Cherie. He is described as looking "windswept and interesting".

Lightning then cracks above both men, at which point the video will be cut to dramatic flashes of the Iraqi conflict then back to the overhead clouds. The rain that falls will wash down the faces of both men as they look up at the sky, "creating a tear-stained effect".

It is believed acclaimed producers Daniel Lanois and Dave Stewart both turned down the recording and it will now be undertaken by Simon Cowell, the controversial impresario behind American Idol and the UK's Pop Idol.

Apparently the song will stick faithfully to the original Harris version although there will be a "moving guitar break".

"Mr Blair is a keen guitarist," said a recording studio insider. "He's planning on buying a new big-bodied Gretsch and sees this as an opportunity to show his sensitive, musical side."

The recording has not been without its difficulties, especially over the closing verse that indicates one of the characters rescuing the other.

It has now been reworked to apply to both Bush and Blair and now reads: "Did you think I would leave you lying/when there's room on my horse for two? Climb up here buddy and we'll soon be flying/back to the ranks so blue."

The duet is scheduled for release in early August.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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