President George W. Bush signed bill no. 4852A into law this morning allowing foreign-born citizens to hold the office of the Presidency.
The bill, hastily drafted and passed unanimously by both the House and Senate, was on the President's desk and signed "before the ink was dry", according to a Congressional aide. This clears the way for President-Elect Barack Obama to take office on January 20th, after a disclosure that Obama was, in fact, born in Kenya.
Obama spokesman Tony Alvaro said "It is unfortunate that certain individuals have chosen to ignore the Constitutional requirements that were put in there for a reason, and so we will be filing a challenge to bill 4852A. There are plenty of qualified native-born candidates who can fill the job, including John McCain, an actual war hero. And, what about that guy Ross Perot who seems interested in the job, and Ralph Nader? Of course, if neither is able to serve for whatever reason, there's no reason President Bush couldn't stay on a little longer while this whole thing gets hashed out."
However, Bush was adamant. "Listen, the shit's about to hit the fan from so many directions-I'd have to be nuts to want to be here when it does. Let me be perfectly clear, I am OUTTA HERE on January 20th. I'm going straight to Crawford, not passing 'Go', not collecting 200 dollars...The only executive decision I'll be making next month will be what color carpeting to put in my Presidential library."
