Bush Calls for Release of Roswell Documents

Funny story written by Dr Talk

Thursday, 27 March 2008

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Washington - In a move that shocked the current administration, President Bush ordered the immediate release of previously highly classified documents pertaining to the much speculated "alien crash" in Roswell, NM in 1947.

The order, signed late last night in a closed meeting with various high ranking military intelligence officers as well as Vice President Dick Cheney, Secretary of Defense Robert Gates, USAF Director General Michael Hayden and Director of National Intelligence John Michael McConnell, is reported to have lasted in excess of 7 hours.

Sources say that this is not the first meeting of it's kind and that these cloaked assemblies have been ongoing for the past year.

A source close to one or more of the participants (who did not want to be identified) has made reference to several individuals and organizations operating both in and out of the United States having played a vital role in this monumental move by the highest level of government. Some of the individuals identified include: alternative media icon, Alex Jones, radio show host Art Bell, Bob Lazar, known worldwide for his astonishing claims of having worked at Area 51, Nevada news anchor George Knapp and Dr. Jesse Marcel Jr., who's father was the Air force officer sent to survey the crash on a ranch outside of Roswell the following morning. Members from MUFON (Mutual UFO Network) were also present.

An address to the nation by President Bush is scheduled for 9 am EST on all major networks. It is expected that the President will deliver a briefing to the hoards of already in place reporters and networks from around the globe, to be followed by an in depth disclosure of the classified material by several of the individuals mentioned, followed by Q & A for an undetermined amount of time.

CNN will begin accepting email questions for the panel beginning at 6 am EST. Full 24 hour coverage on all networks has been confirmed.

There will be several presentations through out the day covering various aspects of this information and will repeat in rotation for the days to come. The Verizon Center is expected to be filled to capacity for the televised discussion which will include approximately 25 individual presenters. The discussion is currently slated as a "no time limit" event.

We managed to get through to Art Bell who was more than willing to share some of the information that is about to come: "This is big. I mean, this is really, really huge. For the first time in history, the world will finally know the truth about extra terrestrials and the government's involvement with them. I have been asked not to go into detail until after the President's address in a few hours from now, but I can tell you this...whether you were a believer or a skeptic, I guarantee you WILL be in utter awe."

Updates are coming in virtually continuously and we will publish as much as we can and as quickly as we can. Check back often or simply leave your browser open and refresh the page every few minutes. We will provide full coverage as this unfolds.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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