Spambots Spam Ron Paul with Money

Funny story written by Charles Eakins

Tuesday, 6 November 2007

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Ron Paul

A global network of hacked PCs spammed Ron Paul's campaign with Money yesterday. The botnet managed to spew 4.2 million dollars to add to the coffers of the Ron Paul campaign. He may not be the leader of the free world, but a botnet may have something else to say about that.

"This is clearly a criminal act, there is no way he has this much support," said Warner Garik the director of art at the University of Albania. "The question is, will other campaigns look to doing this, or will this bring them shame?"

The spamming allegations are based on the word of a psychic named Beitris Anwar. "It just came to me, out of thin air, that these can't possibly be donations coming from real people, so I put on my tin foil hat, which helps me absorb the cosmic rays, and the answer came to me. It's bots I tell ya!"

Some in the online political world have long suspected Ron Paul of being the mastermind behind the spamming of polls by his zombie minions. "Controlling what these real people do at the online polls is amazing, he must be using some kind of mind control!" said George Farris of the Institute on Alien abduction. George Farris is an expert in the field of Alien mind control.

"The interesting thing was that we had different names, with different IP addresses, from the United States," Garik says.

Jay Garrity, director of campaign operations for Romney was heard saying, "Wow that worked!" Jay was later contacted for a clarification and hasn't contacted this reporter back at the time of writing.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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