Kott the tool

Written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 11 September 2007

image for Kott the tool
Pete Kott has been described as a tool in court this week

Anchorage, Alaska - (Corrupt Ass Mess): Former Alaskan politician Representative Pete Kott was called "a tool for screwing over voters - a tool of the oil industry's graft specialists, the VECO Corporation" by a federal prosecutor at the opening of a massive Corrupt Bastards Club graft trial in Anchorage.

"And as we all know that particular outpost of the Alaskan Corrupt Bastards Club has merely been an outreach orifice for the Bush Administration's energy committee supremo Dick Cheney!" trial attorney Nicholas A Marsh added.

Kott is indicted on countless charges of bribery, corruption, embezzlement, fraud and associated offences.

A one-time Alaska House speaker, Kott claims he is entirely innocent of all charges "and was merely carrying out the Bush Administration's energy policy directives" - as translated to him by the state's elder politician Senator Ted Stevens.

Stevens meanwhile is still foaming at the mouth from the humiliation of having the Feds ransack his house in the ongoing Corrupt Bastards Club investigation.

Two weeks ago Judge Sedwick, commenting on the ongoing mess in the Corrupt Bastards heartlands, opined that the Senator's son Ben Stevens "is as much of a corrupt bastard as ever I saw one".

Whether Ben Stevens - like Pete Kott this week - can be called a "tool" of the Corrupt Bastards Club is a moot point.

"A tool? Well yes, maybe," Alaskan sources said today, "although maybe a lot more flaccid than Kott himself!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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