Everyone Knows that the three little kittens have lost their mittens and don't know where to find them. After years of searching Fluffy, Buffy and Bob have given up. But the failure to retrieve the lost kitten-sized mittens is not a total defeat.
The famous kittens announced Friday that they no longer believe the mittens will be necessary. They are counting on Global Warming to keep they their feline footies from freezing. "We have better things to do than search for those stupid mittens," says Fluffy. "Like sleeping and chasing string," says Muffy. "MEEOOOOOW," complains Bob.
Congress has authorized $10,000,000 to study the effects of global warming on other fairy tale creatures, much more than spent studying the possible effects on humans.